Is Happiness Even Real?
by Violet Sunset x
Summary: Meg has had a bad past 2 years. Embry has had a bad life. They can make each other happy or will it end in tears? Jacob becomes like Meg's big brother, and he can soon see the difficulty that they're having. Can he help them or will he destroy his own relationship? "I love you, but I can't do this any more. It's just too much for us both." *story re-done and added as a new story*
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys. Anyone who follows my stories knows that I did have a story published but I lost track of where I was going with it so I decided to delete and restart it. This story is going to pretty similar at the start because I'm using the same chapters but just changing the few things at first, but after about chapter 3 its going to be different. I've planned it out better this time because that way I won't lose track.**

**RIGHT. New readers! Hey! This is a story about Embry and a girl I made up called Meg. I hope you like it. I'm English so I may forget to change 'Mum' to 'Mom' and stuff like that but it shouldn't affect the story too much, I hope. I apologise if I make any spelling mistakes or mistakes with the story because I don't have a beta, I just proof read through it loads. So yeah...**

**Please review because it does make me feel more motivated. I've finished the first few chapters so I'm going to add one once a week, because that's the quickest that I will add them once I write them fully. I have a lot of exams and stuff at the moment so it just depends on when I've got free time that I'll write. It got to a point with my last story that I was adding a chapter barely once a month so hopefully I'll be updating more often than that, but if I don't I'm really sorry.**

**So here it goes, I hope you enjoy it.**

**Disclaimer - All rights of 'Twilight' go to Stephanie Meyer and the publishing team. **

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**Chapter 1 - Memories**

Embry POV

_..._

The ground under my feet - or paws? - was soft and it crumbled as I pounded along. I was on patrol and Jake was going to join me as soon as Renesme let him leave.

I loved being a wolf. It gives you so much freedom. Unless Sam goes alpha on you, that is. At home my mum was always going mental at me for disappearing. I couldn't blame her. If I had a son that wouldn't tell me where he was and stayed out most nights, even when he was grounded for life, I'd be pretty freaked too. She thought I was in some kind of cult. What with cutting all my hair and getting the tattoo and hanging around in a group of tall muscly guys... She once said she thought I was gay. I was so angry at her for being that judgemental, that as soon as I phased, everyone knew about it. They still laugh about it to this day. Sam thought I should tell her about the wolf thing, but I didn't trust her enough. I'd already caused my sister to leave home, I didn't want my mum spreading around the wolf secret or possibly thinking I'm crazy. I was backed into a corner. I didn't have a clue what I was supposed to do. It had been going on for 2 years now. She still hadn't backed off. At least the pack never brought it up so when I was around them I didn't have to think about it.

I never let on about my mum's drinking. It was how she handled what I was doing, and I can't really stop her because I'm the one causing it. You can see the dilemma. At least I had Jake and Quil to keep me going; and the support of the pack. They were like my second family. Well... first if I'm honest. My actual family hated me for what I was doing to my mother. Jake wanted me to move in with him but I was worried about my mum. I couldn't leave her on her own. No matter how much she hated me, I still loved her. She was my mum after all.

Additionally I couldn't move in with him because of the imprint. Nessie, Bella and Edward were always there. It'd be way too awkward. The elders said imprinting was supposed to be rare. Hardly. I scoffed at the thought. Jake, Sam, Quil, Paul, Jared. 5 out of 17 wolfs had imprinted; and the pack only started a few years ago. I know for a fact I didn't want to be next. I was never imprinting. My life was complicated enough already. It was never happening.

_I don't think you have much choice on whether you imprint..._

_**Jake! Talk about no privacy...**_

_Didn't you hear me phase?..._

_**No...**_He barked a laugh at me.

_Must have been some deep thinking, huh?_I could hear the smile... a growl ripped through my teeth.

_Hey, cool it. I was only joking._

_**Don't you have somewhere to be? Like staring at Renesme?**_I was starting to get really irritated now, and I don't get angry easily. Jake was my best friend but he could be really annoying sometimes. I thought imprinting was supposed to change you? Certainly changed Paul...

_Imprinting affects everyone in their own way. I was already calm, unlike Paul, put I will punch if you if you push it._

_**Whatever.**_And on that note I phased back. I'd just done an hour patrol alone so he could do the same. Not having him wind me up. I hardly ever argued with anyone. I don't know what's up with me. I guess I was just excited about school tomorrow. We'd only been back a week after summer break. There was supposed to be a new girl starting tomorrow. I wonder what she's like.

NO! I'm not thinking straight. I don't care. Right? I'm not imprinting. Ever.

Megan POV

I still couldn't believe I was moving from this house. I'd grown up in it. I had been born in it! My dad had died in it. Tears welled up in my eyes. I missed him so much. He always knew what to say. I rarely argued with him, because we were both so alike. I was much closer to him than I was to my mom. Or even my brothers. Or... I was...

I stared at the picture next to my bed. It was from when we visited my Aunt Emily in La Push. My mother's sister. She was beautiful. They both were. Em was only 16 back then. She had the most perfect skin, and she was so pretty. Until a few years ago, when she was attacked by a bear. I felt so bad for her. Her face was ruined. 3 scars down the length of her face and down her arm. But not back then. On the picture I was in her arms. I was only 4 at the time. So was James, my twin brother. Adam hadn't been born yet, and he wouldn't be for another 5 years. I missed him so much.

La Push was amazing when I went last, I was 9 then. I remember being on the beach running around with Jake and Embry and Quil. They were 3 boys that I met there. Everyone on the rez was really close, they all knew each other. They always had bonfires and told old legends. How awesome would it be if they were real? That's what I thought back then, but now I'm glad we don't have vampires and werewolves. The guys were 2 years older than me - making them seniors. I was only a sophomore. I remember them as if it was only yesterday. They were so cheeky. Embry was always the quiet one. He was evil though. Ever so cheeky.

_We were paddling in the shallow sea. I noticed that they'd disappeared. I went to turn around to shout for them when something grabbed my foot. I landed face first into the water. I tried to scream but someone else put their hand over my mouth as I surfaced._

_I suddenly realised the hands were no bigger than mine. I smiled into Jake's hand. Or Quil's. Or Embry's. I didn't want to spoil their fun though so I let loose a scream._

_Whoever had my foot grabbed my other one. Quil grabbed my wrists. I knew it was him because he was even smaller than me. All of a sudden I was swinging in the air with Embry smiling down at me._

_I tried to look upset but failed and a grin spread onto my face._

"_This is for attacking us with seaweed!" he winked at me and nodded to Jake and Quil._

_All of a sudden I was flying through the air. I screamed for real this time. "EMBRY YOUR DE-" there wasn't much more I could say. I plopped into the water halfway through screaming. Water seeped into my mouth. I thrashed about madly not having a clue what way was up. Suddenly my head was in the cold air. I spat the salty water out and looked around. Wow... they'd thrown me far. I swam towards the shore. And towards the boys rolling about of the floor laughing so much they were barely breathing._

_I couldn't help myself. I burst out laughing along with them._

I never held grudges. They were so cute when they laughed. I wonder what they're like now. Probably still as cheeky. I hoped they remembered me.

I smiled at the thought of being reunited with 3 of my closest friends. They were like 3 additional brothers.

"You moving or not?" James grinned at me. "Come on, lazy. Don't want to miss the plane."

I opened my eyes and looked up. He was by my bed picking up my suitcases. I smiled back at him. I could always rely on my brother to cheer me up. Sometimes I don't know how I lived in the same city as him. He could be so moody it's unbelievable. And he always had his TV on really loud. Like I wanted to hear him on FIFA or COD...

But when he was in a good mood, or I was upset, he knew exactly what to say. They say twins have a connection. We definitely did.

I climbed off my bed and looked around my room for the last time ever. We had to sell all our big furniture. There was no way we were going to be able to pay for it all flying to La Push. I was going to miss this house so much.

"Good-bye..." I whispered as I walked out on my old life.

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**So... how was that guys? Was it okay? Please remember to review and add my story to alerts so you know when there's a chapter added! Thanks for reading!**

**- Violet Sunset x**


	2. Chapter 2

**So here's chapter 2. I hope you liked Chapter 1. For the purposes of the story I've made Nessie and Claire 17 because I felt awkward with them being young so it's set quite a while after Breaking Dawn which all happened normally. **

**I hope you like this chapter.**

**Disclaimer; all rights go to Stephanie Meyer and the 'Twilight' publishing team.**

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**Chapter 2**

Embry POV

I had to sit in the woods for another hour to calm down. I must have nodded off, I don't know how long for, because the next thing I knew Jake was nudging me awake.

When I'd woken up, he was giving me a goofy wolf grin. I couldn't help but smile back and pushed his head away. I could never stay mad at Jake. He ran off and within seconds he was back in human form.

"Come on, I got a whiff of Emily's awesome cooking when I ran past theirs. Don't want Brady to eat it all. I've got 3 years on the kid and he can eat 5 muffins faster than I can eat 1."

"And that's saying something." He punched my arm.

We both laughed at the thought of Brady eating all the muffins. I could always rely on Jake. No matter how much time he spent with Nessie, he was always there for me.

"10 on Brady's already eaten at least 3 muffins..." I said, grinning.

"No fair, we both know you'd win... Okay, you're on."

I smiled as I pushed the door open. We both burst into laughter and had to lean on the wall for support or we'd collapse onto the floor. Everyone gave us strange looks but for the next 30 seconds we could barely breathe for laughing. Jake reached in his pocket and pulled out a $10 note and passed it to me.

"What did I tell you..." I managed to speak finally. Brady looked up with a mouthful of muffin and set us off again. He was surrounded by at least 5 empty muffin cases already. That really didn't help. Quil and Colin caught onto what we were laughing at and grinned at everyone, then explained.

"They had a bet on how many muffins that Brady had eaten." Quil said through his smirk.

"Oh ha-ha, mature..." Brady said sarcastically, spraying crumbs all over the place.

"Come on Brady, you've already eaten loads of muffins, don't spray them back at us." Emily said laughing at us and shaking her head.

"Come on boys, the kid has an appetite don't be mean." said Sam smiling at Emily. I wondered where Sam had been. I hadn't seen him all day. I'd have to ask him later.

I grabbed a muffin and started eating. Emily was such an amazing cook. Her chocolate chip muffins were heavenly. The chocolate melted lusciously onto your tongue, and the muffin bit was soft and fluffy. I don't know what recipe she used but man, these were perfection.

"Calm down Embry, stop making out with the muffin and eat it already." Kim appeared behind Jared and wrapped her arms round him.

I grinned back at her. She was one of those people you could never get mad at. She could say anything to you and all you had to do was look her in the eye. She was one of the funniest people I knew. She rarely lost her temper, but when she did, she went mental, but usually she had a smile on her face. You couldn't help but smile back at her. The cheeky look in her eye did it every time.

"So did you guys find anything on patrol?" Sam looked at us after he devoured his muffin.

"Nah, just a small trace of Bells and Nessie, from when they came down earlier." A grin spread across Jake's face as he spoke Nessie's name.

I'd never be jealous of him. Okay, I want to find someone I can spend the rest of my life with, but I want them to be my choice. I mean, what if I imprint on someone that hates me? What if someone imprints on me and they aren't allowed to be with me? It could ruin me. What if she leaves? Not being able to be with her could shatter me. Too risky. I mean, what if Nessie was killed? What would happen to Jake? No one in our pack has ever lost an imprint and in previous packs there weren't enough members to have so many imprints. Most of the time only the Alpha imprinted, so the pack was focused on protecting her and she never got injured.

I suppose it's fine me saying I'm never imprinting, but that's what Paul used to say and look at him now - soon to become Jacob's brother in law. I smiled to myself.

"Embry... Dude... EMBRY!" Jake was shouting in my ear and waving his hand in front of my face. "What the-"

"LANGUAGE!" The spoon hit the back of Jake's head just as he was about to swear.

"English!" He turned and winked at Emily then held his hands up in surrender. "Sorry. Habit. Bella and Nessie aren't happy about me swearing all the time either." He grinned sheepishly.

"What were you saying to me before you started carelessly using profanities?" Claire smirked at Quil.

"Quil, don't try act smart, I taught you what profanities meant today." We all laughed at Claire. Quil pouted so Claire snuggled into him.

"What the beep are you smirking at?" he turned and winked at Emily, who'd just picked up her mixing spoon, and Jake earned another smack on the back of his head and an eye roll.

"Thinking about when Paul told you that he and Rachel were engaged." Laughter erupted from everyone within ear shot. All except Jake, who looked sullen. Rachel wandered into the kitchen looking confused.

"I heard laughter and my name...?" she looked questioningly at Jake who was shaking. "And why does Jake look like he's going to phase any second?" her voice slowly sounding more worried by the second. Paul put his arm protectively around her waist, and looked at Jake.

"Bro... You're going to have to get used to it, it's been a year already." Rachel elbowed him in the stomach and gave him a look as if to say 'shut it you're making it worse'.

"I'm. Going. To. See. Nessie." Jake looked like he was gonna lose it. His teeth were gritted and he spoke slowly as if he was trying to control himself as he spoke.

He ran out the room and we heard the common sound of clothes ripping and he phased barely outside the house. We all looked around at each other. No one really knew what to say. There was an awkward silence for a few minutes where all we could hear was Claire whispering to Quil and Emily stirring more mix.

Emily decided to fill the silence. "Don't know where he's gonna get some new pants but he better not show up back here naked or there will be problems. Starting with me screaming."

"I'd join you." Claire chipped in.

"I think I'd scream too to be honest." We laughed at Seth.

"I kick him in his balls and then scream. Whether I'm used to it or not, I don't want to see it all hanging out if I can help it." Everyone cringed and laughed more at Leah.

I loved my family; I don't know what I'd do without them.

I never expected that moment to change so suddenly.

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**A bit of a cliffhanger for you. I hope you enjoyed the chapter, please review ^.^**


	3. Chapter 3

**I'm so bad at updating. I'M SO SORRY. I kept thinking that I needed to upload a new chapter but with exams and everything going on I've just not had time so I finally found time to do it. Its not a very long chapter, I'm sorry :( but it is a chapter. I'm going to try do chapter 4 and 5 in bits over the next few weeks but I might not. After June my exams will be over so hopefully I'll be able to write more chapters but I'm also attempting to write my own story from scratch so that's more important to me. BUT. In a couple of months I'll have a 2 month holiday so I'm hoping I can write all of my fanfiction up over then and then update it a week at a time (I hope). **

**ANYWAY. Here's chapter 3, I hope you like it.**

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**C****hapter 3**

Meg POV

"Thank you for flying with American hope you enjoyed your flight. You may now exit the aircraft."

I smiled at the plasticized air hostess as I ran down the steps to freedom. Well not exactly but after a total of 5 hours on a plane and 6 hours in an airport and then a 4 hour car journey to La Push equals long day. We just had the car trip to go. Adam was too tired to walk, so James was giving him a piggy back. None of us had slept particularly well on either flight or between. But he was youngest so it was only fair to let him have a rest. This meant I had James's bag over my shoulder, which was nearly as big as me. And was pulling both my suitcases. My mum and Adam were sharing suitcases. Pink flowery suitcases, which is exactly why I was pulling my plain, black suitcases. Talk about 5 paces back. Embarrassing...

I was still wondering about Jake, Quil and Embry. I wonder if they had girlfriends. I wondered if they still lived there. That meant that they would be seniors now. They wouldn't be in any of my classes, even if La Push High was the smallest school ever. I hoped they wouldn't find it awkward with me living near them. I hoped they still wanted to be friends with me. Oh god, what if they all had girlfriends and hated me. Oh god. What if it was really awkward? Mum said that they all hung around at Aunt Em's all the time. What if they made me feel like an outcast? I was starting to feel sick... Maybe we should never have moved. I'd rather live in the house with memories of my dad, than with people who hated me.

"Meg, you okay? You've gone kind of pale..." James' face popped into my line of site. How long had I been daydreaming?

"Yeah... yeah... fine... just tired..." I attempted to smile at him and his came out as more of a grimace than anything. He didn't look as though he believed me.

"Okay. Well Sam's here. You know, Aunt Em's husband? So I guess he's our uncle..." he looked thoughtful. I wondered what he was thinking about.

"Come on you two." Mum walked back towards us smiling. "Adam's fast asleep in the car, so we better get moving. Come on."

I grabbed James's hand, suddenly scared.

"Don't worry, dad's watching over us. He's always there for us, promise." My heart swelled at the thought of Dad guarding us and watching us live without him.

"Pinkie promise?" I held out my pinkie. We'd been doing this since we were tiny. Since we knew what a pinkie promise was. He hooked his little finger around mine.

"Pinkie promise." A tear leaked down my face. Ever since dad died James had changed so much. He hugged me tightly. He became the glue that held us together. He was 7 minutes and 23 seconds younger than me (my mum had made my dad time it so she knew exactly) yet he had always been the mentally and physically stronger of us. James put his arm across my shoulder and we walked towards the car mum was just getting in.

"Stop crying, we don't want to scare away Uncle Sam before we've even spoken to him." He grinned at me and winked. I smiled back at him. He was so like dad. God I missed him so much. But I had to be strong. If mum could do it then so could I. I wiped away my tears and put on a brave face.

We climbed into the car. I was in the middle as I was the slimmest. Adam instantly leaned onto my shoulder and fell back asleep. I put my arm round him. He was so sweet. He was only 5. I'd always been a midget, I took after my mum. I fastened my seatbelt and we were off. James was still holding my hand. He looked at me and smiled. I knew no matter what it was like being back on the rez, that I'd always have his support. I rested my head on top of Adam's. I started to nod off. Might as well try getting some sleep.

James POV

I was half asleep when Sam turned and looked at me.

"James. Sorry, I just wanted to speak to you while everyone else is asleep." He gave me an apologetic smile into the mirror. I smiled back at him and nodded my head, hinting that he could go on. The sooner he spoke, the sooner I could sleep.

"Well. You see. There's no easy way to say this, but, when your father died so suddenly, your mother rung Emily." He seemed to be struggling to speak.

"Yeah, I heard her speaking too her. It was awful to listen to her sob and knowing I'd be utterly useless."

"I can only imagine how upsetting this must be. Anyway, I just wanted to say, don't feel pressured to protect your family once you're back at the rez. We're all your family and we'll be there for them if it gets too much for you, which I know it must do. Just like you, the guys are grown up now, and there's quite a big group of them, so they'll always be there to talk to, or use a punching bag." I looked at him, shocked. He laughed at my face. "Don't worry, they do it to each other. They rarely get hurt so don't worry, they won't be bothered."

He smiled at me. "I'll let you get back to sleep."

"Thanks for saying that. You're right, it is hard to be the strong one all the time." I leaned back onto the car door and went back to sleep.

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**Okay so like I said, not the longest chapter ever, but stick with me and hopefully I'll get one or two chapters up in a few weeks and then more after that! Thank you c:**


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